It was a fairy tale beginning. I was a bridesmaid at my cousin’s bachelor’s eve in Port Harcourt while Chike was one of the groomsmen.
The moment we set eyes on each other, we were instantly attracted, and spent the day getting to know each other and the night in each other’s arms on the dance floor.
I didn’t hesitate in giving him my number at the end of the evening, even with the knowledge that my boyfriend, Benjamin, was living in the same Rivers State.
Things weren’t going well with Benjamin my boyfriend. To say the least, his business was not moving and our relationship had gradually degenerated from that of intimate love and friendship to sex mates.
It was only in the bedroom where our quarrels, frustrations, harsh words and angry tears were replaced with passion and romantic fireworks.
We had been together for four years, on and off, and during the off times when I would start dating someone else, Benjamin would go to great lengths to get me back, and it didn’t take much persuading to get me back into bed with him.
The guilt that followed meant an immediate end to many fledgling romances with other men.
My family didn’t like Benjamin, and were always encouraging me to take a break and give myself the opportunity of seeing what was out there.
I could see the pleased looks on their faces at the wedding when they noticed the attraction Chike and I shared, and on the way home, my mother was full of praise for him and his wealthy family.
Chike sent me romantic text messages at work the following day, and picked me up from my office in the evening so that I didn’t need to walk in the rain to catch a cab or bus home.
He took me to a restaurant where we had dinner and then left me on my doorstep with a sweet kiss on the lips.
That weekend, Benjamin told me to come over to his place. And although I was quite tired of my affair with him, I decided to go so that it wouldn’t look as if we were quarreling again.
I got there to find Benjamin snoring in front of the television, and several beer bottles scattered on the floor around him.
The disgust I felt towards him and his regular evening drinking ritual, especially after my dream evening with Chike, was enough for me to tell him there and then that I was quitting the relationship.
Two weeks later, I couldn’t hold myself anymore. I simply called Benjamin and told him that it was over between us. This time, I meant it, and no amount of persuasion from him would bring me back.
My love for Chike blossomed, and I made every effort to avoid Benjamin. I changed my phone number and even changed my job to avoid the risk of bumping into him in the city. Benjamin finally got the message and didn’t bother me again with his usual tricks.
Meanwhile, Chike and I settled into a comfortable and happy life together. Because Chike had money, he showered me with gifts and weekends away. He even took me to Abuja and proposed to me at the Transcorp Hilton Hotel.
I was happy but a little bit hesitant. The reason was that Chike was perfect in every way, except I craved for him to be more like Benjamin in the bedroom.
Every time we talked about setting a wedding date, I had a reason to put it off.
The reason for my hesitation was that, after returning from Abuja, I came face to face with Benjamin my former boyfriend.
As much as I tried to resist him, we ended up back at his place and made love. This time I vowed to be strong and make it the last time.
Every time I looked down at my hand and saw my engagement ring, I was reminded of the love Chike and I shared.
But it wasn’t enough for me to turn my back on Benjamin. The fact was that Benjamin gave me sexual satisfaction in bed, but Chike didn’t.
Despite this, I still set a wedding date with Chike, made all the preparations, and ordered my designer wedding gown from London.
The wedding was fast approaching, and the tension I was feeling was building. I wanted a life with Chike, but I realised that I would never be finished with Benjamin.
Each time I made the decision to end it, my resolve crumbled.
In the end the decision was taken out of my hands. The day before we were due to be married, Chike came to see me.
The look on his face said it all. He told me he wanted to hear from mwhether I could leave the past in the past and be his wife, and only his.
I told him about Benjamin, and that as much as I loved him, I coulnever be rid of Benjamin. Chike spent several hours, along with my parents, begging me to reconsider.
In the end, the wedding was cancelled and I felt that Chike was betteoff being set free, instead of getting married to a woman like me who would never be happy or derive satisfaction from his performance in
I think that if I had gone ahead to marry Chike, there was no way i wasn’t going to cheat on him with Benjamin. So it was better I didn’t marry him in the first instance.
Chike always found it difficult getting an erection, and even when he did, he just couldn’t make me reach orgasm.
Besides, he didn’t seem to want sex as much as I did, and it drove me crazy. I had to cancel my wedding because of my fiancé’s poor sex drive or libido.
At least one of us is free. Benjamin still continues to toy with my emotions and I don’t know what I’m going to do next.
My life is now a miserable mess. I hear from my cousin that Chike has moved out of Port Harcourt in order not to set eyes on me again.
I feel stupid to have lost my fiancé because of lack of sexual satisfaction, but still I think I took the best decision.
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