When to leave your marriage

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Social media makes the world seem so small. Now, we can tell what’s going on wherever across the world in an instant, magical world indeed! Yet, we cannot discountenance the predominance of negative tales on the social media though.

While I marvel at the massive abuse of this social freedom by those who prefer propagating mostly negative issues and making the world seem all terrible, I have also learnt to be thankful for the seemingly slightest things in my life. For one, I am thankful that my parents stayed married and for all the love they showered on us through the years. I wore my cap of gratitude having observed that most children are left to grow up in the care of either one parent or none (left with relatives).

If you are concerned about the present rate of divorce and marital squabbles around, you may have more need to worry when those children who grew up without experiencing parental love are faced with the task of raising families themselves. How can they hope to sustain families when they never had the chance to learn the actual meaning of the word beyond the letters?

The spirit of family is about love and togetherness even in trying times. My parents were not perfect, in fact they were two very different people but that never stifled the union. We had greater moments of peace but the few times they disagreed, l learnt life lessons. Dad was usually on the offensive and mum would most times let him win. Yet, those rare times when she took a stand much to his chagrin, dad would still come around quickly and it would seem like it never happened.

I learnt that family is about sticking together even when it’s hardest. Daddy never skipped food or slept out on the basis of annoyance. Likewise, mum never left the house or threatened divorce. They both wanted to be together more than they cared to disagree. I remain thankful to them for showing us just what it should be.

The case is different for those who never experienced the love of a real family. Many of them may never appreciate nor give true love because they have no idea on how it works.

In extreme cases, staying married may be one of their greatest challenges since they are clueless having never understudied the situation. People who are quick to ask for a break or leave home at the slightest provocation are usually from troubled or broken homes. It is thought that since brokenness is what they know, they will unconsciously crave it even when they think they want to heal.

Family defines and shapes our personal lives more than we know or care to admit, everyone needs a real family to grow right. While this is not to condemn separations or divorce especially in cases of threat to life, there’s need to do all possible to save our homes before letting the bar down. The main worry is that most marriages succumb on account of the most trivial issues. The ease with which many give up on their marriages questions our values. We had best realised that for each parent that walks away, two children may do same thinking after all it wouldn’t be a first.

Sustaining your home today enables you contribute to the stability of your generation. Today is your chance to not create a precedent of instability, do not give up on your union so easily. When to leave your marriage is when staying means death. Otherwise, stay and work it out.

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